creepy isn't it

i love those silly online survey/games just as much as anyone. but sometimes they sort of freak me out a little. anyone who knows me will be able to pick out exactly what i'm talking about. take a look.

Your Superhero Profile

Your Superhero Name is The Golden Maximus Your Superpower is Mind Reading Your Weakness is Confrontation Your Weapon is A Fairy Wand Your Mode of Transportation is A Clown Car

What's your Superhero Name?

just a few flakes

between the boy, football season and programming time at stonewall (hanging out with my beloved juvenile deliquents) things have been pretty busy. a short brush with bronchitis had me down for a few days, but now i'm back to juggling life. here are a few pictures i snapped with my camera phone over the past few days.

the 25 most exciting seconds in college football and the largest jumbo-tron in a college stadium. god its nice to be a tiger fan!

erik and i are learning to compromise.

sometimes i forget this is here. my co-worker carol snapped this shot one day after i realized i didnt have a single picture of it.

one last point. here is a fun blog i found recently. its great for people like me who like short bursts of wit throughout the day. enjoy.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PROJECT OPTIMISM!

yay! its been one year (and 10 days) since my very first post here on p.o. and i just noticed, this is my 100th post! amazing isn't it? this here little website (that sounds better if you read it with a slightly southern accent) has chronicled the past year in my life. and its been a real doozie for sure. a year ago, i didnt have a camera phone, i hated my job, i had major separation anxiety from miriam, i was depressed and single. i created project optimism initially to spread some optimistic energy around to some friends and hoped that what i knew in my head, would eventually trickle downstream into my heart. fake it till you make it, i always say. you never know when things will change. just like the weather. monday night it was 32 degrees and raining at home, today, sunny skies and 81 degrees. (this type of climatic change reeks havoc on my sinuses) just goes to show if there is anything that isn't going your way just right this minute, give it a little time. things will change. the inverse lesson is also just as important. if you're loving life right this minute, cherish it. make memories and be thankful, never taking for granted what you have. for it too, can change in an instant. it is this constant roller coaster that gets us out of bed every morning. that gives us hope for the future and appreciation for the now.

quote for the day: "i'm not in denial, i'm just selective about the reality i choose to accept"

better late than never

ok, in my newfound slackness, here are some pictures from a short, but fabulous road trip to florida. dad and his buds went down early for their testosterone fest deep sea fishing trip. luke and i stayed with my life partner miriam (who, although was pulling for the wrong team, looked smokin' hott at the game). we drank a lot of beer. clemson won the football game. i think that about sums it up.

back my semi-popular demand

i know, i know. i've read all (both) of your comments and emails. my adoring fans (all two of you). kristina and miriam, i know that both of you deserve more. and i hate that i have let you down. please accept my humblest apologies. so what's been going on the past errr... month or so?

yes, as if you didnt know, there is a man in my life. and no, its not murray, my dad or luke. you know, the usual suspects. for years i've fluctuated between bitter, yet empowered, independent woman and weeping, depressed, lonely spinster. especially after my life partner moved away to pursue her dream of law school (like i could let my selfish love for her stand in her way), i struggled with the depths of loneliness unlike anything i've ever known. i went off in angry tirades at many happily married friends who said obnoxious things like "it will happen when you least expect it". even still makes my skin crawl.

well, things are a little different now. about 2 months ago erik called me for luke's new phone number. you see, i've known erik for years, a childhood friend of luke, our paths crossed every few years or so. about 2 years ago luke and i went to miami for a football game and i developed a full out crush on the boy. while we got a long well just hanging out, he was otherwise completely disinterested. oh well. since august 11, things have snowballed beyond either of our belief. 7 hours a night on the phone of endless laughter arguing over who is the biggest geek, which star trek series is supreme and how to deal with people who take themselves too seriously led us both to believe that perhaps we've met our match. i had a long time ago given up on anything "magic" or even romantic. conceding that someone who wanted the same things in life and was willing merely to put up with me would have to be enough. i figured no one would ever find me beautiful, or laugh at my nacho cheese joke, much less, both. i was even sort of looking forward to my "i'm-30-and-still-single-so-fuck-you birthday party". i'm not calling off the birthday party just yet, but i'm going to hang on to the deposit for the band and tent rental for now. just until we see where things are heading. and i promise, i'm not moving to west palm beach. no way, my hair can't handle the humidity here, can you imagine the fro i'd have in florida?

speaking of birthdays. the cutest/craziest puppy in the whole world turned 4 last sunday and luke turns 28 today. my, my, my, they grow up so fast.

true humanity wears orange

thank you miss coles for pointing out my slackness, (i'll write more about that later) and for your post featuring this touching article. GO TIGERS!

lay me down in a field of flame and heather

last night i went to the counting crows concert with luke and his girlfriend cassie. it was amazing. the counting crows are one of those bands that i could listen to 24/7. from upbeat-happy to sexy-spiritual. it reminded me of my earlier years when a good praise chorus from the christian rock band, third day, could send me spiraling into a fit of singing, waving and crying. it might be the words that speak to my heart, it might be the loud, overwhelming music or the energy from the masses of people, with the counting crows, it was all 3. it was definitely a concert for the true fan. they steered away from their more popular radio played hits and played songs that only people who listened to the whole cd would know. luke and i sang every word and motioned to each other during funny lines that reminded us of each other like "we spent all day getting sober", something luke and i have had shared many times.

it was a little creepy that my ex, stephen was there. i haven't seen him in over 3 years. i never saw him, but he saw me, he said. he knew what i was wearing and where i was sitting, so he informed me via text messages. after a few polite declines to meet him at the beer stand, i just ignored him, not having the will to just tell him to fuck off as miriam suggested.

i just found out i have a 3 day weekend. hallefreakinglujah.

a very fun weekend in the atl

besides the 4 hour ride with pops on the way down, during which i was forced to listen to rush limbald and various other forms of talk radio where old men yell at each other about minorities and football, i had a fabulous weekend in atl.
saturday morning we went for a fun filled trip to ikea. my ikea virginity. i bought a small assortment of kitchen accessories and several decorative pieces. it was a good time.
then we ate lunch at the varsity.

everyone had a good time.

dominic even got his own icecream cone.

d and i played yegos and bob the builder (notice the absence of a picture of me wearing fun yellow hard hat)

then we ate my birthday cake, 4 layers of chocolate cake, soaked in amaretto, layered with dark chocolate and stawberries soaked in chambord. and then more chocolate. it was yummy.

the end.

everybody needs a hobby

and because i have the maturity of an 8 year old boy.

i find this wildy entertaining.

just for kicks

Emily: married, with kid
Erica: married, pregnant
Kim: married, pregnant
Steven (cousin): married
Bekah: serious relationship, talking about marriage
Nate: married
Rio: married
Jenny: married
Amelia: married
Kristin: married
Celeste: married, 2 kiddos
Matt (ex): married, 2 kiddos
Jon (ex): married, kids?
Seth (ex): married
Stephen (ex): married twice
Amanda: married
Megan (co-worker): married, kid
Victoria (co-worker): engaged
Erin (co-worker): engaged
Becky (former jr. world saver): serious relationship
Kimi (former jr. world saver): engaged
Lauren Hill (former jr. world saver): married
Andrei (cousin): married to McCamy
Luke: serious relationship
Miriam: fabulously single
Me: ha!

conclusion... you're smart, you figure it out.

UPDATE: DISCLAIMER... dear friends, I do not define you (nor myself) by relationship status. i was merely making an observation/classification, for research purposes only. i love you all. (oh and yes, Kristina is also single, but if I included her and Carol, it throws off the punch line)

happy birthday miriam!

today, we honor the birthday of my very dearest friend. through thick and thin, times of wealth and poverty, sickness and sanity. i can't believe that its been 8 years since we met, even though we weren't really friends at first. miriam lived above me in our humble dorm at g.dubb. it wasn't until the following year that we really became friends. back then, a six pack of beer could get us both shitty all weekend. the gym was ours to conquer every morning at 6:00 and rio and nate rounded out or inseparable foursome.

our junior year of college we bonded over psychosis. sometimes ours, incessant spying on the hot football players that lived downstairs. sometimes the illness belonged others like a narcissistic roommate or a hotheaded ex-boyfriend of mine. miriam was even attacked by a crazy goose, and suffered the loss of her favorite flip-flops.

just before our senior year of college we both turned 21. we learned a valuable lesson. a fifth of vodka didn't cost $20. she forgave me for barging in on what was almost a kiss from the man of her dreams. the year our closets were full of sequined halter tops and tight black pants, was the same year her feminist tirades really began to emerge.

i've hardly ever cried so hard as the day after we graduated and drove away from the place that brought us together, wondering if we'd make good on the promises to visit and call often. it was only a few months until my begging convinced miriam to come live in charlotte with us (luke, luke, and i). four people in that apartment was way too many, but boy, rent was cheap and living was good. that year, the girl who had been home-schooled nearly her entire life, took a job teaching public high school. we laughed and cried and she gave indignant speeches solving all the worlds problems while we stayed up until after 2 am making christmas candy bags for her 140 students.

the next 2 years miriam and i lived together, just the two of us. the true test of friendship. neither one of us having the ovaries to be particularly confrontational, we solved our problems the way all strong women do, we sent a few emails and pretended it never happened. and granted, mims isn't the cleanest person i've ever known, but i've seen her spare a bugs life and set it outside to freedom, carry a lost box turtle from the middle of the road down to the creek and even rescue flies from drowning in the swimming pool. she bravely took on a roach after i locked them in the bathroom together. she solves all of the worlds problems like republicanism, war, poverty, hunger and men over a cup of fat free, sugar free hot chocolate. i love that she makes cd playlists with showtunes, metallica and tupac. i'm afraid i'm often a disappointment to her when she's looking for a good argument. while we don't always agree, i've never known anyone with more conviction for what she does believe. she's too humble to admit it, but she's touched hundreds, probably thousands of lives. her brilliant mind should be advising the world's top leaders, but she's dedicated years as a public servant, teaching public high school and spent two summers volunteering her time to provide free legal help to society's downtrodden.

i consider her special brand of philosophy--compassionate feminism with cleavage. i have no doubt that one day she'll ban meat from the white house while wearing a low cut pink t-shirt and flip-flops. and i'll still be so proud to call her my friend.

happy 22nd birthday pookie.

(pictures to follow, blogger isnt cooperating right now)

destin, by camera phone

exhausted. suburned. broke. but i finally got all of the sand out of my bathing suit.

here are a few pictures, from my camera phone, i havent downloaded the digital camera yet. more to follow.

leave a message at the beep

this afternoon miriam and i are off to florida. a quick stop in tally to help mims pack, and then we plan on spending a whole lot of time doing nothing in destin, fl.
thats a picture, a real life picture. not digitally or color-enhanced. the sand is pure white quartz and the water is clear. its nickname, the emerald coast is well earned. dont be jealous. do send love.

riddle me this

its no secret that i'm not cool. my lack of knowledge of pop-culture, my love of npr and my complete disregard for fashion often lend me to being an outsider. maybe i'm just too overrun with logic to care. i wont spend $80 on a purse, period. now, every red (and blue) blooded american female seems to own a fancy vera bradley something. since these handmade-looking, quilted bags and purses hit the scene, i have been baffled as to their appeal. as any good church going southern girl can tell you, they look just like those hand-quilted bible covers your grandmother made and gave you for your 8th birthday. personally, i think that vera bradley must have grown up a good southern baptist. she got a good deal on all the left over quilted-bible-cover-making material, made a few purses, sent them to a few hollywood socialites (who obviously did not grow up good southern church goers), and voila! instant fashion trend. everytime i see someone carrying one, i want to ask them if they keep their precious moments bible in there. you tell me.
vera bradley

bible covers

birthday update

am i old enough to retire yet? this working stuff is the pits!

thursday night i went out with mims and a few friends from work to see simplified play at hickory tavern (i know! up past 9pm on a week night! who knew?!?!) clee (simplified's lead singer) bought me a shot after the first set and asked what luke and i were doing friday night. (friday being both mine and clee's birthday. woo hoo!) i told him pops was taking us (plus miriam and jenny) out for dinner and after that we didnt have plans. he insisted we hang out with the boys at the press box. ironically, this dive was around when my grandparents were dating. how cute. friday night we listened to a two man band, named "three", (dont ask), had a few drinks and enjoyed an evening outside with friends.

another year wiser

my dad called: "just checking to see how you're doing. you're on the downhill slide towards 50 now"

me yesterday (age, 25)

me today (age, 26)

too much time on our hands

it doesnt happen often, but sometimes clinic is a little slow. recently, it was one of those days. becky is leaving and moving to hong kong. the poor girl is going crazy because her husband has been there for 3 months. anyway, this is what happens when a communicable disease nurse, an hiv case manager and myself have access to plastic penises and too much time on our hands.

i'm going to miss becky. notice my cleverness in staying behind the camera [phone].

I MET MO ROCCA!

this is quite possibly the most hideous picture of me ever taken, but you get the point. miriam says i have "ovaries of steel". i think even she was quite embarrassed. i had no problem begging the head usher to get us better seats, asking the sound manager to give a note to mo, or shouting out infront of almost 3,000 people that i made AND was wearing a t-shirt that says "MO, you ROCCA my world!" to which paula poundstone replied, "how could i confuse this place with charleston, you guys are sooo much classier"
thanks to wfae, npr and of course "wait wait dont tell me" for making this happen.

yes, i'm a geek.

UPDATE: 07/21/06 8:50am
ok, now that i've had a little sleep and the geeked out adrenaline has worn off a little, i thought i might be able to put together a few more thoughts. so yes, miriam and i went to a live recording of npr's radio news quiz show, wait wait don't tell me. we hadnt even got out of the parking deck when wfae staff (local npr affiliate) noticed and complimented our homemade t-shirts. we stuck out in the sea of maturely dressed, public radio listeners. our tickets were for the 3rd row in the top balcony, not exactly primo. i guess years of working with needy people has taught me that you might as well ask for what you want, the worst thing that can happen is you end up with what you have. its only up from here! (an example of how this works: i begged my way onto oversold flights for nate's wedding). after i charmed the head usher into giving us the unsold "hold" seats on the floor, we made our way up to the stage where our FABULOUS t-shirts got the attention of one very kind sound engineer. feeling not at all shy, i asked if there was anyway we could get on stage for a picture with mo, and he looked around and offered me a notebad on which i quickly scribbled a note to mo. he promised to pass him the note before the show. the show went on, we laughed at all of the politically incorrect humor, cheered as the cast made fun of and complimented the south, and miriam even let out a token "OW! OW!". after the show, they had an open mic for audience members to ask questions. i jumped up and down waving my arms, begging for carl kasell's attention. miriam slumped in her seat with embarrassment. my inner-dork would not rest! alas, i made ourselves known to the crowd. the erupted with applause and laughter as i read our shirts aloud to the crowd of 3,000. and i got my wish, we met mo rocca, carl kasell and paula poundstone!

as we walked out of blumenthal on the greatest adrenaline buzz ever, the very kind sound engineer came up to us and asked if we got to meet mo. he said he had given him the note before the show, and mo was very cool about it and definitely flattered. mo said "if anyone asks me what charlotte was like, i can honestly say, they have a lot of love". and we do, we really do.

"if we were gay, we would tell you"

contrary to popular (e.g. weird neighbor guy and t-nat) belief, miriam and i are not gay. and today she sent me this article about another fabulous female duo that had to answer the same question. so what if two very attractive, single, educated, and not to mention wildly entertaining women decide to spend their every waking minute eating blueberries and sushi and watching brokeback mountain, together? if we were gay we would be prancing around telling everyone. i would probably even give in and wear a pink shirt that announced so.

*thanks to oprah for the quote in the title

moe money? no problem!

i can hardly believe my good fortune lately. i have several times referenced my favorite burrito joint. just a short year ago, there was only one in the q.c. now, there is one just blocks from my not-so-new place of employment, and two, that's right DOS within 3 miles of mi casa. (ok granted that's not as overdone as the 5 chick-fil-a's in the same radius, but still).

life is good.

next thursday night, i have a date with mo rocca. dont.be.jealous. well, actually i have a date with tlmc and t-nat (aka boycott boy). i'll have to sit in between them so they don't argue all night. we're going to see a live recording of "wait! wait! don't tell me!". i know, we're the coolest kids in town. tlmc and i are considering making "i heart mo" signs and t-shirts, we want to get on stage. well actually tlmc wanted to throw her panties on stage. she's crazy.

shameless plug.

thats right, t-nat has a book out! i'm very excited for him. i was totally an insider on this project from the beginning. (i was even consulted for the cover artwork and author bio picture. tee didnt like my idea for either). i'm not smart enough to provide a true literary critique. i have the same opinion i do for books, movies, poems, and music. i like what i like. i'm just not deep enough to say anything else. but its super. i definitely recommend it. the way i see it, you have two choices, you can either order your own copy or wait till i send you one for christmas. (but you know how slow christmas is). so don't wait, order yours today!