wanted

date for this wedding weekend
must be willing to dress up, smile and make polite conversation with guests
and engage in snarky banter about bridezilla with feisty family matriarch

i did promise my aunt jennifer (her son is marrying bridezilla) that i would "be nice" and also that i would have a flask on hand for when she needed it. she was thankful. at least there's booze at the rehearsal dinner tomorrow night. oh and in case you didnt already know, i dropped out of the wedding. the $300 bridesmaid dress wasnt returnable, so look for it on ebay soon.